omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Randomize
