What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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