Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
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