the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
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