This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
I just googled if crying burns calories
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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