But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
Randomize