Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
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