someone get that fucking seahorse.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
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