He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
It's shark week go big or go home
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
There's even glitter on my cock...
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize
