Non-Jews are for practice
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize