can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Randomize
