omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
Is her dick bigger than yours?
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
