he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
