I want to stick my p in your. b.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
Randomize
