She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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