Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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