I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Randomize
