I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
I said "one day" and that day is not today
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
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