Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
Randomize