what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
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