everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Randomize