Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Randomize
