I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
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