I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
