I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
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