this will be a night to untag.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize
