Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Gay?
German.
Pity.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
Randomize
