Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
