That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
