You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
