okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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