is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize