I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
Randomize
