hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
Randomize