I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize
