Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
