dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
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