Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
Randomize
