he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
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