matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
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