At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Randomize
