just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize