Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
