Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
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