I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
