i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Randomize
