I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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