when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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