I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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