Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
