Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
Drake has all the answers
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Randomize
