i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
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